A new face around.. and a new Mama!

Get ready for some honesty....

Okay friends (and family) I've been going through a very emotional time the past month of being back in Saudi.  I've really been faced with the feeling of being inadequate, a constant failure, never being good enough, never finishing what needs to get taken care of.  I've been an emotional wreck and have had a hard time adjusting to things.  For one, Gavin's now in school... new routine, new days.  Miles is ALL.OVER.THE.PLACE.  He's learning, expanding his boundaries, and just growing up.  I feel like there is NEVER enough time in the day, nothing ever gets done (or so I feel), and days are always piling up with more events, get togethers, responsibilities, etc.  Not to mention, being pregnant, I'm just tired ALL.THE.TIME and exhausted.  

Brooks and I noticed there were lots of days the past month where I just wasn't myself.  I wasn't depressed by any means, just overwhelmed.  I'd cry at the drop of a hat.  I'd be a basketcase if something little occurred, or I'd be unable to start something, because I already felt like there was no way to finish it-- therefore, more things weren't getting done.   I know if I'd cut out my extra curricular activities (cake decorating, friend lunches, etc) that would alleviate some time, but everyone needs a life and a hobby, or some kind of outlet, right?!?  

Well, after some time, then I started really getting anxious about bringing a 3rd child into this world.  How in the world do I take Gavin to school in the mornings, have 2 other babies awake, dressed, fed, and out the door every morning?  How do I go to the grocery store with one in the carseat taking up the entire basket and the other sitting upright in the front of a grocery cart wanting everything that's in my hands or around me?  How do I be back from running all my errands in time to get Gavin from school at 11:30am?  I'm already bringing one pack and play to bible study on Tuesdays for Miles to take a nap, do I buy a 2nd one so two kids can nap at the same time? or do I host bible study every week in order to have a place for my little one's to sleep?  Dinner time... yikes... I already am burning meals left and right, or leaving out ingredients because I'm doing laundry, folding laundry, loading & unloading the dishwasher, or yelling at Gavin to get off the beach because he walked out the back door and I never saw him, all at the same time, and then forgetting to kiss my husband when he walks in the door.  

UGH! I realize that all moms go through this and all moms handle it and things can be done!  I've learned to be okay with laundry staying in the dryer for a day or two until I can get to it, and I can't tell you how many nights we've gone to bed with toys EVERYWHERE!  I've really struggled with why things aren't getting done when I don't work, I'm home most of the time, and there are very few places for me to actually be.  Yet, the feeling of failing and being inadequate was really, really getting to me.  Not to mention the heaviness of what's to come when Brooklyn gets here.  If I can't take care of my kids and house now, how am I going to do it later?  

Brooks and I have always talked about me getting some help while we're living here due to the availability there is to hire help and in a VERY economic way, however, we (or him) always decided against it because we ultimately felt like it just wasn't necessary.  Which, I will say, when I wanted help after Miles, things ended up working out and it really would have been silly.  But something has changed.  I can't pin point it, but things just seem different.  So... we started discussing the option of bringing in some help part time and we wanted to have someone here before Brooklyn comes to ensure we like our help, we're comfortable with them, they know us, our routines, the way our house runs, our personalities, and that we know them!  

Enter Delia!   

this was Delia's first day-- her and Miles clicked right off the bat!

NOPE!  You're not seeing things!

That's a picture of a God sent woman who is amazing!  She's only been in our lives a little over a week and I'm blessed beyond words!  I'm humbled by this woman who has taken care of my children as if they were hers, she has made my house a home in a way that I've only dreamed of doing (she even asked if she could reorganize Mr. Brooks' closet before she put in his folded clothes... um-- sure!).  She has ironed more clothes in a week then I've ironed in 5 years of marriage!  Okay, or maybe my life, but who's counting.  She has learned, successfully, how to operate a dishwasher, washing machine, and dryer-- 3 things she has never had that were electric, rather manual-- literally.  (Think getting buckets of water from the sink and pouring into a small washing machine, only to spin a dial yourself once it's soaked to rinse your clothes, and then hand dry them all outside).   She fixes and prepares Miles bottles, breakfast, and lunch.  She allows me the opportunity to take Gavin to school without having to wake Miles up early everyday.  She cleans and picks up while Miles is sleeping.  She plays with Miles while I go to Bible Study every Tuesday, and she even entertained Miles while I took a nap the other day.  I've learned that all I have to do is tell her or show her something once and that's it.  She gets it!  She is AMAZING!!

Don't get me wrong, this has taken some time getting use to, but I'm much more relaxed now.  She knows that if I'm home and she's here and I want Miles, I get him.  I've had to teach her that it's okay for Miles to crawl, sit by himself, and sleep in his room, ALONE.  She had a hard time with that one-- she's from the Philippines and they don't have big homes, so there kids always sleep in the same room as them, thus, allowing her the chance to watch them when they sleep.  I taught her how our monitors work and showed her how you use them to listen for when your baby is awake. That took some time getting use to, but now she's okay with closing the door to his room while he naps.  It's amazing the things we take for granted!

I'm so appreciative for her and having her in our lives. I'm praying this works out and am doing my best to treat her with the utmost respect and let her know every time she's here how grateful I am for her.  Do you know how tough it is to sit on your computer blogging, while telling someone to wash, dry, and fold your laundry?  All the while, you are sitting right there!  Not as easy as it looks!  But, after a week-- you do get over it!

I'm also so grateful and appreciative to Brooks for being willing to let me hire some help and give me a peace of mind that I have needed for a while, now.  I promise you this- Brooks is not complaining. The days Delia is here (she's only part time, right now) everything is picked up, organized, taken care of, in place, etc, which makes my man HAPPY!  After her first day here and he saw his closet completely  organized, everything was folded, in it's place, he yelled down to me that he found his Philippino wife!  He thought he was in heaven!

I'm enjoying getting to have free time where I'm not juggling 100's of responsibilities and am loving the extra time I get with my boys to just sit and play and relax.  I'm hopeful that I can continue to be at ease with not feeling guilty for having someone do things for me that I probably should be doing and I'm looking at it as this is a perk to living overseas and having an expat life.  

Houston Friends

We've been blessed with the opportunity to have some of our dear friends from Houston move over here to our side of the world and live about an hour away.  We've known the Acord Family since 2009 when they became our small group leaders at our church, CCCC, and we've been friends ever since.  Things have worked out where we've been able to get together with them at least once a month maybe more to have dinner, play at one another's houses, go to birthday parties, and just hang out.  We're glad to see familiar faces outside our compound and love how close in age our kids are and to know they get to have a familiar friend on this side of the world, too.  

Last week, after spending the day together at their house, they drove me and the boys back to Jubail, where we live, we met Brooks for dinner at a local Indian Restaurant and had some good times!  

They've already bonded! 

These two are pretty goofy!

A few weeks ago we also went to the Acord's house and spent the day celebrating Peyton's 3rd Birthday!  It was a blast eating ice cream sundaes, cake, and spending time together!

Looks like Gavin was trying to be in their family picture

these two were inseparable

After Peyton's party, the Acord's compound had an Eid Celebration which marks the end of Ramadan, a Muslim holiday, so we went and checked things out.  There is a HUGE camel behind us and of course someone walked in front of it right as we were taking a picture.  You could literally take camel rides-- see the basket in the top left corner.. but after watching it take one walk Che and I immediately said, um. NO!  That thing wobbled like I don't know what.  The kids still liked getting to see a camel up close!  Gavin is still talking about the camels at Peyton's house.  It was a neat experience, though.

Baby #2's just chillin!  They are THE most relaxed, laid back kids ever.

Looking for another Victory

Meet Brandon.

This is Brooks' little younger brother.  As long as I've been a part of Brooks' life, there is one thing I know....  Brandon means the world to him.  These two brothers have a relationship like no other.  I've learned over the years that when Brandon is around, my husband is another man and I love watching him get to play and goof off.  These two guys have a special, special bond that no one can come between and it's amazing to watch and experience the depth of their friendship together!  

In January 2004, Brandon was diagnosed with Acute Lymphocytic Leukemia .  He was 3 days shy of his 15th birthday.  He experienced 3 years of chemo therapy treatment, several strokes, kidney stones, infections, and more, but ultimately, he triumphed through it and on the day he graduated from high school (May 2007), he took his last chemo pill.  He was cancer free and had been after only 34 days of treatment, but still under went 3 years of maintenance.  During that time, Brooks and Brandon's relationship got even closer as Brooks watched from the sidelines as his brother fought the battle to live.  

Brooks and Bran October 2004

Bran has spent the past 4 years living to the fullest and really embracing life.  

This summer Brandon was sick off and on and was having headaches that he contributed to working camp, long hours, little sleep, etc.  However the headaches then turned into pain in the neck, occasional blurred vision, and other side effects that didn't seem to go together.  After a week of being sick continuously, it was time for Brandon to get things checked out.   Bran had multiple tests run on various areas of his body and on August 20, Bran was told his Leukemia was back and this time it was in his central nervous system.  

Brandon has been going through treatment for the past month and responding very well to the medicines.  After 27 days; weekly spinal taps, chemo treatment, and more, Bran was told his body was in remission. Praise God!  He was given a "road map" for his treatment that will last for 2 years.  Bran will undergo intense treatment that will cause him to be hospitalized for days at a time each month as he receives his chemotherapy.  The idea/goal is to attack his cells in an aggressive manner to help keep another relapse from occurring as well as he is older this go around, his brain is fully developed among other things, and his body can handle a little more.  (At least, that's my understanding of his treatment).  

Please keep Brandon in your prayers over the next 2 years.  We're believing that his body will respond to all necessary treatments, he will feel good (as much as he can), and that this will be an "easy" road for him.  He's beat this once, we know he can do it again.  We're looking for another victory!

A lot has changed for Bran in the past few months.  He had to withdraw from Baylor, where he was a junior this year.  He was told it would be a while before he could return to a normal school class schedule.  He has moved from Waco to Arkadelphia, AR where he is living with his mom, Mrs. Missie, and she is able to take care of him during his treatments.  Mr. Geary, Brooks' and Brandon's dad, flew to Arkansas during Brandon's first week of treatment and was able to spend some time with him.  Brandon's girlfriend, Kate, actually goes to school in Arkadelphia so she's around, too!  I'm sure they are loving not having to do a long distance relationship anymore!  Just a little perk in this whole situation.  Brooks has adjusted to not being there with Brandon, but they talk multiple times during the week and Brooks' is still looking out for his little brother.  We're grateful and thankful that Brandon has a lot of support from family nearby in Hot Springs as well as Kate's family in Conway.  Brooks was given permission that if he needed to rush back to the US for Brandon he can, so we're appreciative for that opportunity.  

We will keep you updated on what's going on with Brandon's treatment and recovery, but please just be praying for him and the family!  You can keep up with things that are going on through a website Mrs. Missie is updating regularly to keep everyone informed of what's going on... check it out....

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/brandonnileperry

G.I.R.L. GIRL

I'm incredibly late on officially announcing our news on the blog, but we're having a girl!!  Can you believe it?  Brooks and I can't!  I think we both thought ultrasounds didn't read "It's a Girl", but they do, and we are so excited and can't wait to meet our baby girl in February.  

I realize this isn't the most gracious first picture of our sweet little girl, but I just thought it was hilarious.  This is the picture that showed us the sex of our baby.   

                                 

I had an ultrasound the week before I flew back to Saudi and asked the ultrasound technician to tell me if he could determine the baby's gender.  He said yes.  I was 15 weeks at the time.  I quickly told him I didn't want to know, but asked if he'd put the picture in a sealed envelope so that Brooks and I could open it the moment we were together from my summer trip in the USA.  

So, the night we flew into the Kingdom, after having some family time, Brooks and I went up to our room and unpacked the picture from suitcase and made the reveal.  Brooks was shocked and literally said nothing.  I was surprised... I think deep down I was expecting (and prepared myself for) another boy.  It took Brooks about a week for it to sink in.. no, he wasn't mad about the news.  I really don't think his mind grasped the concept of a girl right off the bat.  It's been 5 weeks since we found out we're having a little girl and we are both just besides ourselves.  Brooks told me last night he has a feeling this little girl is going to steal his heart away.  

I've told (and asked) both my sister in laws to help me with the clothes situation.  I like the more casual style on boys-- shorts and t-shirts, but literally have no idea how to dress a girl!  I've been asked a lot lately about my color scheme for her room, the nursery theme, etc and it literally scares me to death.  I feel a lot of pressure for some reason, but know that it will be fun getting things ready.  We're definitly going to have to work on the room situation for her in our house, but that will come in time, once we're reading to move Miles into the same room as Gavin.

We're thinking, planning, and 90% certain her name will be Brooklyn (for Brooks and Lindsey put together), but we've yet to decide on a middle name.   We've had the name Brooklyn picked out for a little girl since before Gavin was here and both my previous pregnancies, had one of our boys been a girl, her name would have been Brooklyn so it only seems natural that we'd stick to what we've always liked and wanted!  

We can't wait to meet her some day and are excited to think about the new dynamic that is going to come into our home when she's here!  I have a doctors appointment next week so we'll get some updated ultrasound pictures of her soon!   

Choo Choo! All Aboard!

We had a fun weekend celebrating Gavin's 3rd birthday.  

Friday morning, Gavin woke up to a big surprise-- his birthday present from mom and dad.  Yes, we were two weeks late on giving it to him, but our schedules have been so hectic since we got back to Saudi, that there weren't many opportunities to put it together nor give it to Gavin when we were both home in the mornings.  Gavin walked down stairs and immediately found the blanket that was hiding something.  Brooks helped him uncover it and there he saw his Choo Choos, as he put it.  He was so excited!  He actually raised his arms up in a victory sign he was so excited!  He played and played and played with the table all morning.  He looked at every single part of it, inspected it, learned every sound it makes, and was simply in awe of his table.  The main reason we got this train table for his birthday, is because his best friend Cade had one.  They always played trains together and it was a memory we will always cherish that Gavin and Cade had together.  We wanted to let that memory stay alive by having a train table in our house.  Gavin was very grateful for the present and on his own omission ran and gave me a big hug!  He kept telling Brooks and I thank you, thank you!

After spending the morning together as a family, we started getting things ready for Gavin's Birthday Party.  We threw him a train themed party filled with trains, trains, and more trains.  We actually threw Gavin two parties.  The first party was for Gavin and all his young friends.  We set up the bounce house, put together a Thomas the Train tunnel, and had train tracks put around for all to play with.  Everything went great.  The kids had a fun time and Gavin loved playing with all his friends!  I think Gavin's favorite part was singing Happy Birthday to himself.  Thankfully, he only asked to blow the candles out once.  

By the way- thanks Aunt Anna for making the train t-shirt.  It was perfect!  Every person who walked in the door Gavin said Welcome to my Birthday Cake!  Look at my choo- choo shirt!

Gavin was blessed with lots of fun gifts and he was extremely grateful for all of them!  He got puzzles and trucks, and craft activities and clothes.  He got a neat Handy Manny figurine with tools, and some great sports activities (basketball goal, dart board, etc).  My parents got Gavin a LeapPad before we left so one of our neighbors got him an App Card to download games to it.  (If you haven't heard of the LeapPad, it's an IPad for kids.  It's really cool and very durable. It's very kid friendly and was perfect for the airplane ride and traveling!)

Look- there's Gavin's friend, Peyton, from Houston!  The Acords, our small group leaders from our church, moved to Saudi back in May.  They live about 45 mnutes from us so they got to come celebrate Gavin's birthday with us.  Peyton had her 3rd birthday party last week that we got to spend time with them there, too.  We love having the Acord's here and love that Gavin and Peyton get to continue their friendship together.  Those two have known each other since they were 8 or 9 months old.   

Gavin has been asking for a scooter ever since last April when all the big kids around our compound got motorized ones.  We decided he needed to learn how to ride a bike first.  He's still been asking for a scooter and he had one in the states at my parents house and LOVED it.  So, of course, who else but Aunt Steph and Uncle Micah would get Gavin the scooter he's been wanting.  Stephanie found one here and actually got him the size up from what we originally thought he needed and Gavin did awesome riding it.  Like, literally, awesome.  He has taken that scooter everywhere this week and goes fast.  Brooks and I were pretty amazed with how fast he picked up riding a two wheeler.  

Did I mention we had two parties for Gavin on Friday?  Well, we did.  Not to spoil him, but rather to make things easier.  I really wanted a little kid party.  One where kids under the age of 5 could play together, enjoy the bounce house, and have little kid activities without the hectic and crazyness that all the million older kids, who are always around, would bring.  Living on a compound, you get close with a lot of people.  So having parties and dinners, makes it really hard to exclude people, because you are so close to so many.  We decided we'd have a little kid party in the afternoon, then invite all our friends with older kids, who we knew would want to celebrate Gavin's birthday with us, over for dinner that night.  Gavin got more presents and got to sing Happy Birthday and blow his candle out one more time.  The 2nd party went great!  Everyone was there (another plus about living on a compound)!  No one has anywhere else to be so you generally never get any no RSVP's.  Gavin had fun with all the older kids- they laughed and goofed off a lot.

 I'm pretty sure it's safe to say our little man had a very fun, filled day, all about him!  Brooks and I enjoyed watching the smile on Gavin's face and will cherish the memories we made celebrating his day! We can't believe he's already celebrated TWO birthdays here in the Kingdom.  Wow-- that's a crazy thought!

Gavin's 1st Day of Preschool

As my friend, Christa said, "I'm interrupting the summer posting series to bring you the important event of":

Gavin's First Day of Preschool

Yes, Gavin started school today.  I can NOT believe it.  Technically, he started pre-pre school, but still, it's school. A real school.  We got him a big boy backpack and lunch box (even though he doesn't eat lunch at school) and bought all the necessary school supplies he needed.  We've been preparing Gavin all week for school and making a big deal about him going to BIG BOY school.  We explained a lot to him that he was going to be staying at school and that mommy would come home with Miles.  He seemed okay with it.  We woke him up this morning, made him a good breakfast, dressed him a spiffy outfit, put his backpack on him and went off to school.  We did take the typical first day of school photo on the front porch before leaving.  I think I was so nervous and Brooks was anxious to leave on time, that we didn't take as many pictures as I would have liked.  Gavin didn't seem nervous and acted excited, until we got into the car and the realization hit him that he really was going to school.  He showed some signs of being worried, but Brooks and I did everything to keep him calm.

When we got to school, Gavin kind of took off.  Now, he was ready to be at school.  We found his classroom and tried getting settled.  When we arrived, his class was actually split into two groups, two different rooms that were connected to one another by a door, however, I didn't know that.  I couldn't find Gavin's cubby in the first room, rather, I couldn't find his name anywhere.  I started getting really nervous.  I found a teacher and she said then he must be in the other room.  We walked next door, found his name on the sheet, found the spot for his backpack, and his nametag.  I quickly realized all of Gavin's other friends from our compound were assigned the other room.  I wanted to cry.  I just kept thinking oh great, he's not going to want to stay, he's not going to know anyone, this is going to be horrible.  I tried focusing on getting Gavin ready for the day and was trying to tell him everything I could think of to make his day easy and fun.  The teacher came out in me and I quickly realized maybe I was overwhelming him.  I showed him around the room and tried getting him to be familiar with his surroundings.  He kept looking for his friend Devin, who was assigned the other class.  Eventually, Devin came over to Gavin's room and they buddied up.  Not sure how things were going to go once they were split again, but hey, it got Gavin over his nervousness and he wanted to play!  I was so thankful Brooks was there with me.  He really helped keep me calm.  Miles was with us and did awesome.  He is such a laid back, relaxed kid.

The time came when it was time to go and I swore I would not be one of those parents that stayed around.  I tried so hard to stay focused on the fact that this was going to be good for Gavin, he would love it, he'd get settled, and would be fine!  I started crying.  I tried HARD not to, but I couldn't control it.  Gavin was fine, until he saw me crying.  Then, he got worried and started fussing a little bit.  I quickly told Brooks to show Gavin where he would potty at school so he'd know, and I dried up my tears.  I hugged Gavin goodbye (okay, so there were still a few tears) told my little man bye and walked away.  He went right back to playing with all the toys!

Outside the classroom, I cried with a few other moms and sent Brooks off to work. I cried the entire way home in the car.. like, I balled like a baby.  I think my driver probably thought I was crazy, but who cares.  I can't wait to go pick him up and hear all about his day.  I'm sure he loved it.  I'm doing good now.  I'm fine really.  I've had a quiet morning so far at home with Miles and am now off to our first ladies Coffee Morning of the year.  Will let you know how things went later...

*** Update- I went and picked Gavin up and he had a good day.  He said it was fun and he got to play.  When I asked him what he did, he kept saying he told his teacher NO!  Not real sure what that means- whether it was a good or bad thing, but he said he's willing to go back tomorrow!   

Miles 8 Months

Miles turned 8 months old.  He is growing up so fast and we are loving having him around.  He's starting to show more and more of his personality to us.  He's laid back, easy going, pretty content, yet, knows what he wants.  He LOVES eating baby food- hence the semi orange noise.  I've been making all his baby food and he actually prefers homemade versus the store bought containers.  He is taking 8oz of formula and just recently decided he doesn't want his bedtime bottle.  Fine with us!!

Miles is a funny kid, too.  He's very observant and makes hilarious faces and random noises.  He LOVES playing in the dirt, gets excited for bath time, and would prefer being with Gavin all the time.  Miles LOVES to climb on things.  Anything he can stand up on and climb, he does it.
He's a fun kid to have around!!